I’m probably (hoping) speaking to an understanding audience when I say that it’s easy to get busy and lose touch with the things that really matter. The days fly by, meaning so do the weeks and months…and suddenly you open your eyes and it’s almost 2015. I don’t say this to condemn myself or you, but I do realize that I’ve been away from writing, something that is so dear to me. I think of it often…this blog is on my Favorites Bar as a tab on every window I open. I see it lurking there. I ignore it until I feel so compelled to write, just like I ignore my electric bill until it’s almost too late. The problem is, there’s no fee if I miss a post. I don’t miss my bills because at that last second, I get myself together. So, now is my time to get back on the writing train.
Perhaps the most distressing part of being away from writing is that it is my most intimate connection to myself and God. When I write, I feel the words flowing out of me, and in these moments, I feel as though God could be sitting inches from my chair. This probably has contributed to my hesitation to get back in to writing. It makes sense, right? When you fall off the train, it’s almost easier to stay on the side of the tracks than to make the jump again. I run into this with my relationship with God more times than I’d like to admit. I get in the habit of praying regularly, going to church, writing in my blog – whatever it might be – and it feels good. I feel whole; connected to myself, the people around me, and my God. But when those habits fade, I feel a sense of “I’m too far gone” and it holds me back from returning my relationship with Him.
So, however humble this move may be, I am hopping back on the train. At a time in the year where we are all called to reflect on the graces and blessings that God has given us, I am making an intentional re-commitment to being present to myself and God. Only then can my eyes be fully open to the blessings. Only then can I work better to radiate the love of God to those around me. Only then. Pray for me?